Showing posts with label Marxist Swine. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Marxist Swine. Show all posts

Saturday, November 8, 2008

A Day Late and A Dollar Short, O-bots


Now that you fascist Democratic frauds got Comrade Obama elected, you're all ready to work together with us "48 percenters", promising to listen, respect, and even -- what a laugh -- "fight for us!" 

All in the name of "unity."

I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.

Gee . . . so in other words, now that you've sentenced us to four years living in a concrete government two-bedroom tenement eating sloppy gruel prepared with the hour of electricity allotted us, we'll all be able to take comfort in knowing that we're at peace with our "52 percenter" brothers and sisters.

Well thank you, Obammunists, thank you so very much, because that was what I was really worried about. In fact, I don't care a whit that you've helped shove me into forced labor while my parent's retirement funds are being stolen by electing a man who couldn't even fork out the dough to pay his own campaign workers. Oh no. Not in the least. Not as long as I'm reconciled with you.

You know, in other times, under different circumstances, I'd be deeply humbled by and grateful for your magnanimity in extending the olive branch in the aftermath of your victory. Honestly.

But considering people sharing my political views just spent the last eight years being subjected to juvenile invectives from you totalitarian idiots, witnessing you lifting your chin and calling people like me Christofascists, xenophobes, Nazis, homophobes, racists, trigger-happy morons, subretarded inbreeds, etc., etc. (and those are the cleaner ones), after listening to eight years of you defend radical Islamic terrorists who want nothing more than to wipe us "infidels" off the face of the planet, calling for our troops in Iraq to turn their guns on their own leaders and high tail it out of there, watching you march in the streets supporting your leftist causes and cruelly shutting us down when we try to do the same, and generally acting like a bunch of amoral, egostical, malicious, and crotchety brats, I'm afraid that I'm just not ready to offer any more in return than a hearty, "Yippee-kay-ay, mother--s!"

You're behavior is a perfect analogy to an abusive parent, who, after eight years of denigrating, undercutting, beating, and generally making life hell for the child, suddenly decides that it's time the two of them "make up and make this relationship work", as if the poor kid had anything to do with the wretched situation in the FIRST place.

When your Dear Leader is blatantly violating our First Amendment rights with the "Fairness" Doctrine, trying to eliminate conservative talk radio from the air, will you be there, protesting in the streets and calling for his impeachment, just as you used to go into full-blown conniptions whenever you thought that someone might listen on on your phone calls back home to Ma, Pa, and Little Tuck?

When your Ascended Demigod Among Mere Mortals decides to enslave citizens into the service of his Obama Youth, directly breaching the thirteenth amendment, will you be ready with pitchforks and torches just as you are when you fight the airwaves, newspapers, and internet, frothing at the mouth and screaming your infantile rants, every time someone starts talking about reinstating the draft? (Which you always manage to pin on the Bush Administration, God only knows how.)

When your Messiah gives the final push to eliminate my Second Amendment right, will you flash up the barriers and picket signs and yell "BACK OFF!", just as you screech into manic fits of derangement every time you perceive a slight to your holy Roe v. Wade, especially considering that my right to bear arms is, as opposed to your "natural right" to abortion on demand, actually, ya know, in the friggin' Constitution?

Somehow, I can't see you doing any of these things, but I'm willing to be proven wrong. We'll see how it goes. If you do manage to pull off being decent human beings for a change, then we can talk about "making up" and "unifying ourselves".

Because you, my friends, are the ones who have a whole heck of a lot of "making up" to do.

Until then, you are cordially invited to all take long walks off short piers, like the subfunctioning lemmings you are.

Hypocritical Obammunist Cow

I'm seeing red.

Of all the sick tactics of the Syphilitic Left, the exploitation of children, in any form, gets me the most riled up.

You can watch the footage I'm ranting about below. Instead of this overpaid, ignorant sow of a teacher actually, you know, teaching, she turns fifty minutes of class into a "Hate Against John McCain" Kum Bah Ya circle.



She does not know how lucky she is that: a) I can't drive; b) I don't own a gun; c) I don't know where she lives. Does it make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside to know that you were able to get one over on a little girl? Yeah, real freakin' cool, you useless piece of fat. Let's step outside, just you and me; I would drag you to the seventh circle of hell and back if I was in your class. Did you notice how she decided to crucify the kid whose daddy is in Iraq, fighting to preserve this lying donkey's freedom, such as it is. God knows Comrade Obama has already enslaved her puny mind.

Wanna tell us who forgot to flush after they squeezed you out, Diantha Harris?

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

English Class Cheated on Me

I was going to avoid the election until tomorrow, because I knew if I paid attention today I would act like a PMSing Chris Crocker

And guess what: I was right. More on that below.

Turns out, my English teacher had different plans for today. She decided that we should spend 30 minutes today following the election (through blogs, TV, or other means) and jot down our thoughts on it. I spent my 30 minutes in the seventh circle of hell, and now you can share in the misery. Here are my notes:

v    6:42 pm McCain just lost Ohio. He now has 124 electoral votes, and 49% popular vote. Obama has 199 electoral votes and 50% popular vote. Why do we need to have electoral votes? The conservatives might actually have a chance of winning otherwise. But California still needs to be tallied in, and that would undoubtedly tip the scale in Obama’s favor. Well, it will anyway, I suppose. I’m barely literate right now. Fear has me in a haze.

v    6:49 pm Obama has 19,480,495 popular votes, while McCain has 19,184,965. I just posted on my blog about the election. It’s helping me to think clearly again. So many people my age just don’t understand how important this is. I’m so scared, and my dad just banned talking politics in the house, so I have no one to be comforted by.

v    6:52 pm Popular votes: Obama – 20,822,014; McCain – 20,414,522. It doesn’t look like there’s any chance for McCain to pull through now, especially with California still off the charts. I was holding onto a sliver of hope. It was just incinerated. I hope these next fur years aren’t quite the hell I’m envisioning.

v    6:55 pm Popular votes: Obama – 21,110,153; McCain – 20,650,932. Christians will be under attack. We’ll just have God and each other soon. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or bad.

v    6:58 pm Popular votes: Obama – 22,190,557; McCain – 21,624,493. There’s a family that goes to my church that I baby-sit for sometimes A very nice family, really. They’re liberal. I’m sure they’re voting for Obama. I don’t think I’ll be able to baby-sit for them anymore. I can’t be in that close proximity with someone who caused this. I know that sounds hateful, but I can’t help it. The whole situation just makes me so friggin’ mad I could spit nails.

v    7:01 pm Electoral votes: Obama – 206 (Oh God, he only needs 64 more); McCain – 135. I think America’s under judgment from God. In the Bible, when a nation was under judgment, it was given bad leadership. We had Clinton, Bush, now Obama. Nuff said.

v    7:04 pm Popular votes: Obama – 22,635,152; McCain – 22,017,149. I’m actually getting teary watching this. Can the libtards even comprehend what they’re doing to us? We’re gonna have another freakin’ 9/11. My dad has a friend who converted to Christianity from Islam named Daniel, and Daniel said that all the Muslim terrorists he knows consider Obama to be “their candidate.” Not to mention the fact that Obama continuously voted against trying to protect infants of live abortions. Even Hillary Clinton voted for that. What do these things tell you? The man is a tool for the devil. He’s sick.

v    7:09 pm I have three more minutes until I can stop. I can’t take this any longer. I developed a headache a while ago, I feel like I’m going to start crying, and now I feel nauseous.

v    7:10 pm My connection just timed out. I can’t watch it anymore. 

All of that is original, folks. My really real view while watching McDorkbrain's downward spiral. Right after I wrote that I went down to dinner and had an emotional breakdown at the table. The flip side of that is now all the negative chi is out of my system, so my headache's gone and I'm feeling more positive. Still . . . things aren't all ladybugs and rainbows, ya know?

I'll try to post later with more covering the election, but I need to take an immediate break from it.

You want to know the saddest thing about this though? No, I'm not talking about the fact a pansy-ass lying weasel  is going to head up our nation. I'm being infinitely more selfish than that. No, the saddest thing is that I used to love English class. I trusted and adored it's vaults of knowledge and creativity.

I feel betrayed by it.

Like . . . like . . .

Take this analogy: I have a dog named Ginger. English class is Billy "Blowjob" Clinton, who has a dog named Imalyingscarybastard.

I feel like Ginger just went and had puppies with Imalyingscarybastard.

. . .

I'm sitting at my computer, keeping tabs on CNN's live election results.

McCain just lost Ohio. He has 124 electoral votes, and 49% popular vote.

Obama has 199 electoral votes, and 50% popular vote.

And I just realized, "Oh my God, Obama is really going to win this election."

It didn't sink in before now just how serious this situation is. 

Look around America, you're under judgement.

Look around libtards, your Golden Boy is a tool of punishment.

Oh my God.

What have we done?

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Obambi vs. McVain (or, May the Good Lord Save Our Sorry Asses)


I've been purposefully avoiding speaking about the election. Yes, color me a bad blogger, but my anxiety level has actually gotten to the point where the mere mention of the Obamessiah winning this election has made me want to slit my wrists with a broken window pane. If it was up to me, in all my infinite wisdom (yes, you should be sensing the sarcasm here, ladies and gentleman), Obama bin Biden would be quarantined on an island in the South Pacific, along with their messages of "Teh One can bring us Hope and Change! Eingkeit und Recht und Freiheit für das Amerikanisch Vaterland! Abstimmung für Obameinführer!" (But honestly, all kidding aside, does it not scare the shit out of anyone else that Hitler's message was "hope and change," too?) 

Not that McVain is any gem, either, but he's the lesser of the two evils. And if the sheeple get out of their funk long enough to elect McCain, we'd have Palin in the White House! Wooooot!

But I did not write this for the sake of debating the tickets, because you already know about them and I might be put on suicide watch if I have to think much more about the extent to which McDorkbrain screwed this puppy up. No, instead, I have a proposition:

If Obama bin Biden swings this, I want to declare Wednesday, November the 5th, 2008 National Jump the Border Day. Anyone who does not want to be stuck four years under an oppressive jackass dictator in a socialist republic will mosey on down to Mexico and establish himself as a drug lord. After releasing your anger of Teh One assuming office through corrupting the lives of countless druggies (and don't say "But I'd never do that!" because a piece of Communist . . . um, feces brings out the sadistic, vindictive streak in all of us -- or sucks our souls from our bodies, but badness either way), you jump back over the border as an illegal immigrant, therefore being eligible for Obambi's welfare and healthcare plans!

Oh yes, 'tis quite an amazing plan, I know. Take a moment to bask in the rays of its magnificence.

. . . Okay! Moving on.

For all my Christian brothers and sisters out there on the interweb, keep praying! I'm with you in spirit.

For all the rest of my fellow bloggers, throw darts at the pink elephant of Obama's incompetence.

May God bless this election, and pull us out of the grave this country in intent on digging for itself. 

And just remember this when you get random urges throughout the rest of the day to go down to your nearest Safeway and but a pack of razors, crawl into a dark corner, and sob things like, "My life hurts no more than the rising sun hurts the moon.": "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" (Jeremiah 29:11, NIV)

P.S. By the way, in case you couldn't figure it out: yes, Obama supporters, the Demotivator at the top of the post is for you. So siss the feet of your of your Führer and hop in line for your government cheese. You are the cancerous idiots that made this Lemming Apocalypse possible.